


Yeah, like that happens!

by astartelydianna



Series: Designated Consent Smut Series [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Awesome Darcy Lewis, F/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Sex Pollen, Smut, Tony Being Tony
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2016-02-10
Packaged: 2018-04-20 15:18:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4792433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astartelydianna/pseuds/astartelydianna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When asked to fill in her form for sexual consent in the event of an emergency involving sex pollen and of gas, chemicals etc. Darcy just laughs and puts "Iron Man" because you know, that happens, like never! </p><p>Until it does.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The Darcy/Tony installment of my Designated Consent series. Who to have Darcy write down next? I'm not sure. The next installment probably won't happen until after I've put the next chapter of Spank Bank and/or Nothing to Fear Except Fear Itself. Suggestions always welcome for future works, prompts fuel plot bunnies.

"Jane? Jane, what's happening to me? I feel like I got either the best or worst roofie ever." Darcy babbled at the scientist. Jane took her hand, despite it being restrained to the bed and squeezed reassuringly.

"You've been drugged Darcy, they're contacting your designated person now for you." She told the younger girl calmly. "You're going to be fine in around fourty-eight hours either way but they can't sedate you because we don't know exactly what you were dosed with."

"Oh god, if I'm going to be here for that long like this I'm going to need you to be like the best friend ever and either get dirty with me or get me a vibrator or something." Darcy pleaded. "Please Jane, I cannot stay trapped here like this for two days! I need my arms!" 

"Darcy! You're going to be fine." Jane insisted. "That's what form .... Was for!"

"Form? Oh shit...that form about freaky sex pollen and biochemical whatsit thingies?" Darcy cringed. "That was real? I'm pretty sure I put something really stupid on mine..."

"Like what Darcy?" Jane frowned, suddenly looking concerned.

"Um..."

~*~*~*~

"Let's see...who to sex me if I'm all lust crazy..." Darcy mused, tapping the pen against the desk. "Oh I know, Iron Man, cause you know that totally happens to people!" She laughed to herself as she continued the paperwork without another thought.

~*~*~*~

"Oh my God! Darcy! That form wasn't a joke!" 

"Right now I don't really care! If Iron Man wants to come in here and get me off great, if not find someone, anyone!" Darcy pleaded with the older woman.

"You can't have anyone else. It has to be someone you are openly in a relationship that is already sexual with or someone on the form." Jane said throwing her hands up in exasperation. "You've been drugged, you're not able to give consent in this condition!"

"If I'd have known that this was an actual thing I'd have put anyone between eighteen and fifty that isn't morbidly obese with semi-decent personal hygiene!" Darcy snapped. 

"Well, I can't vouch for the hygiene...I sometimes forget the essentials when I've been awake for fifty-six hours." A voice said as the door opened. "Wow, you're hotter than I thought you'd be."

"Holy shit!" She blurted out, looking at Tony Stark as he entered the room confidently, still in the Iron Man suit but with the faceplate turned up. The women looked on as his suit folded itself away and left him stood in jeans and t-shirt.

"Right...I'm pretty sure that's my queue to exit." Jane announced, standing and stepping away from the bed.

"No! You can't leave!" Darcy blurted out.

"Not what I was called for but I'm flexible." Stark commented.

"Bye." Jane said, darting out of the door which hissed shut behind her. 

"I have to say, this is a situation that is totally insane, unheard of and well, stupendous really." He mused, pacing the room slightly. "I mean, being called on to help someone who is in desperate need of pleasure...that's like a total fantasy really."

"Are you here to torture me or help? Because right now I need to come or be knocked out. Either one is fine but being led here all sweaty and crazy is seriously going to kill me soon." She panted, wishing that she could move. Restrained as she was the only thing she could do to gain even the slightest relief was to just about rub her thighs together.

"As the Lady commands." He said, crossing to the door. For one horrid moment Darcy thought he was leaving but instead he pressed a button on the wall. "Can I you know, untie her? This already feels kinky enough without the props."

"Affirmative Mister Stark." A voice replied from the speaker next to the button.

"Oh thank god." She groaned, as the billionaire wasted no time in moving to the bed and undoing the buckles on her arms, legs and middle. Immediately she grabbed at her own breasts, desperate for some kind of release.

"Allow me to help you with that." 

Before she could really think anything more than the words "Tony Stark" his hands were sliding around her waist, helping her sit up and lifting her top up and off. She sighed as she felt his calloused hands skimming across her bare skin. That felt better, that felt amazing. Her hands snaked out to grab his t-shirt, bunching it in her fists to shove it up enough that she could touch his skin. He helped by lifting his shirt over his head and tossing it to the floor before climbing onto the bed with her, kicking his sneakers off as he went. 

Darcy looked up at the man kneeling over her, his face close to hers, her eyes dropped to his broad shoulders, his muscular biceps and his flat stomach. His chest and stomach wasn’t excessively toned, not like his arms, which obviously came from lifting and physical work. He must actually get his hands dirty in his work, despite being a millionaire. She glanced back up, his eyes were fixed on her face, watching her observing him.

“You’re right, this is total fantasy material.” She said. Then he kissed her. His lips moved across hers, skillfully luring them apart so that he could delve in deeper. Hands, her hands were like out of control, roaming his arms and chest without any command. Fisting into his hair none to gently, as she tried to hold herself up as close to him as she could get. 

Not minding her rough behavior in the least Tony moved one of his knees between her legs. He eased them apart, so that he could lower himself over her, until they lay sprawled across the bed in a tangle of limbs and tongues. She moaned into his mouth when she felt a hardness pressing against her. He was only a little taller than her, which put his growing erection at the perfect angle to grind against. She pulled her mouth from his as she gasped for breath, waves of pleasure catching her by surprise.

“As much as I would love to take full credit for that, I think we can safely say the drugs are making you extremely sensitive.” He smirked.

“Shut up and take off your pants.” She replied flatly. “And mine.”

“I love a bossy woman.” He murmured, ducking down to unbutton her pants and tug them off. He pulled her socks off with them and stood to rid himself of his at the same time. Darcy was trying to remember how the clasp of a bra worked and practically yelled in triumph when her breast bounced free and the lacey garment fell into her lap. “Christ, these hands down are one of the best pairs of breasts I have ever seen.” Then his hands and mouth were on them.

“They’re obviously my best feature.” She gasped out, trying to reach down to push his boxers down. His mouth left her nipple with a pop as he eyed her up and down.

“I’d vote for your mouth actually but these are definitely after of the top three.” He commented, his hands palming them more gently this time. His mouth trailed a path across her ribs and stomach, nipping at the sensitive skin over her hip bone and drawing more needy noises from her. “Very sensitive, this will be fun.”

“Dick, inside, right now!” She snapped.

“Calm down there sweetheart, we’ll get to that.” He assured her, his fingers hooking over the seam of her underwear as he knelt up to remove them. His hands immediately slid up over her thighs, pressing them wider apart until he could lean over and taste her. His tongue gave a few small licks over the very top of her mound, before slipping lower and tasting across the entire of her wet center. He moved back up, circling the sides of her clit a couple of times, before dropping down to her entrance and pressing his tongue into her.

“Oh god…” she whimpered. He moved back to her clit, pushing two fingers inside her to resume the slightly thrusting motion his tongue had done moments ago. When she came apart this time his control was gone. He shoved his boxers down and reached around for his pants pocket, to quickly find a condom. Before the aftershocks of her orgasm had finished fading away he was in her. 

Their movements were fast and uneven. Darcy practically writhed beneath the man begging for everything her could give her. When his hand shifted to rub against her clit in time with his thrusts he felt her clamp down around him. Her entire body tensing, her sounds muffled as she bit her lip in ecstasy. He followed shortly after, thrusting with abandon until her released inside her.

Tony dropped his head against those glorious breasts as he caught his breath. 

“Best S.H.I.E.L.D. emergency ever.” He panted. Darcy laughed aloud and he looked up to see her looking a lot more coherent, ever with the darkened color of her eyes and post-orgasm flush of her skin.

“Glad I could provide some entertainment.” She told him, trying to unstick her hair from her forehead. “I’m sorry you had to come here for some stranger, I’m Darcy by the way.”

“Darcy Lewis, Dr Foster’s assistant.” He nodded, carefully moving next to her on the small bed. “I read the file on my way over. Although, I actually heard of you before. I read the report on Thor’s arrival to earth a couple of months ago, did you really pull a taser on him?”

“Yes, yes I did.” She nodded. “But it’s fine, we’re totally cool about it now.”

“I didn’t get to meet the guy, by all accounts he sounds like a hoot.” He said.

“Yeah well when we manage to get him back, I’ll bring him for a visit to New York, that’ll be hilarious!” she panted his arm. “I need a drink and a shower, then like a cheeseburger or something, I’m starving. Take that as your excuse to leave or invitation to join me, whichever you like.”

“Huh, I don’t normally do the after sex thing…it’s normally more awkward than this…like with cuddling and things.” 

“Pfft, like anyone wants to cuddle when they’re all sweaty and gross.” She snorted. “And honestly, I just met you and we’ve already had sex, I think it’s pretty safe to say I’m not expecting romance.” With that she got up and headed to the adjoining bathroom.

“Ah but you see, that’s the problem, they usually do expect romance.” He said, getting up to follow her. “I’m rubbish at romance, it’s usually boring.”

“Totally with you dude, who wants a candlelight dinner and roses and having to dress up, when they can have a giant greasy pizza and a big tub of ice cream on the sofa in their underpants?” she asked, stepping under the water.

“I have a feeling we’re going to be great friends.” He stepped into the shower behind her and stole the showerhead from the wall before she was done with it.

“Of course you want to be friends with me, I’m awesome!”


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fast forward to at least one year after Tony Stark saves Darcy from Sex Pollen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically it was an idea for a scene I had so I decided to write 1000 words for the scene I wanted and here it is.

It had been an accident really. She never meant for it to happen, told herself to actively avoid it in fact. Darcy Lewis didn’t really do relationships or serious, people always let you down in the end. Did that make her sound bitter and twisted sometimes? Maybe, but in her eyes it was realistic. So exactly how Darcy Lewis ended up living with a guy was still a complete mystery, even years after the fact.

"There are no brownies left. Why are there no brownies left?" Tony huffed from the kitchen. "Lookin' at you Darce."

"Hey, you fell asleep after last night and I was hungry, I'll make more later." She replied from the couch. "Besides, they were my brownies in the first place. Bruce, tell him they were my brownies."

"I'm pretty sure she did make the brownies Tony." Bruce said obediently, without looking up from his notebook. 

"In my kitchen, with my ingredients." Tony pointed out.

"Like you even know what ingredients are in this kitchen." Darcy snorted. "You know what, next time I'll make the brownies in my kitchen, in my apartment and then I'll eat them at home."

"Bring me some." Tony called out, pulling a packet of cookies from the cupboard.

"Nope, you'll have to come get them." She smirked.

"I've seen where you live. It is not a place I want to be, nor a place you should want to be, which is probably why you never go home." He said wrinkling his nose in distaste.

"I go home, my clothes are there." Darcy retorted.

"Also they are here." Tony said, picking up a pair of black and purple striped socks from the couch, before he sat down on it. "And in my room."

"And in the lab." Bruce added.

"Sorry Bruce." Darcy grinned.

"No explanations needed. Please." He murmured wryly. "But you do practically live here."

"So do both of you." She shrugged.

"I work here." He pointed out.

"And I do live here, half of the time." Tony said. “It’s my building.”

"I sort of work here too." She pouted. Admittedly she was a bottom pay grade assistant for Jane who now worked under Stark Industries funding. Jane used the tower as a base of sorts, returning here for weeks at a time to collate data and work on hardware. She also worked with other scientists here, including Bruce but very rarely Tony. Jane and Tony didn't really get on. At the moment Jane was shut away in the labs at S.H.I.E.L.D. with Erik helping to make sense of the science in Erik's brain that hadn't been there before. Darcy remained at the tower to help Jane when she got back. One day sat at S.H.I.E.L.D. had been enough for her enough for her.

Jane and Darcy had an apartment, an apartment that Darcy rarely went to because she was usually in Tony's rooms in the tower and Jane rarely went to because she was often in her trailer upstate where she could better see the stars or occasionally at the tower in Thor’s room when Thor was on world. It was true. Darcy practically lived at Stark tower, Avengers tower...whatever but really when she compared the high tech gadgets and unlimited supply of coffee and alcohol to her damp apartment with bare cupboards and a tiny television it wasn’t surprising she stayed here so much. 

It was then that she noticed that Tony had been quiet for several minutes and he wasn't eating or drinking.

"What's up?" She asked. He looked at her considering for a moment before replying.

"We live together." 

"No we don't." She said quickly. "I have my own place."

"You're always here when I'm here. You cook here, eat here, have clothes and stuff here. Mostly in my room and bathroom." He pointed out. "You’re living with me."

"I..." She didn't really know what to say to that.

"You know the most entertaining part of all this?" Bruce asked with a small smile. "I don't know which one of you looks the most freaked out." 

"I'm not freaking out." Two voices blurted immediately.

"No, not at all." Bruce chuckled.

"Bruce, there's a girl living with me, I think that counts as a freak out situation." 

"Hey its not like this isn't a two way thing. You always seem to want me here so I never leave." She pointed out. "Naturally that means some of my stuff ends up here."

"Well, who else is going to watch cartoons with me at three AM when I can’t sleep?" He asked. Silence fell as the occupants of the room realised that some rather big revelations had just been made.

"Bye." Bruce said sheepishly, leaving the room.

"Traitor." Tony muttered.

"We can just...ignore everything that just happened?" Darcy suggested. "Just carry on as normal."

"You can stay." He said quietly, not looking at her. "I'd like it if you stayed."

"As in..." She gestured to the doorway where his bedroom was behind them.

"As in live here. All the time." He nodded before downing his last mouthful of coffee. "Darce you even have stuff at my place in Malibu from last month, just...stay."

"OK." She agreed. "I'll...stay."

Years later it was still impossible for them to tell how exactly they became a couple. What had started as him rescuing her from the wrath of sex pollen had become occasional naked fun. That had turned into particularly best friends, then things started to get a bit blurry. They never really labelled themselves as a couple or said I love you. Tony knew she did, Darcy knew he did. He wouldn't have ever asked her to stay otherwise. Occasionally Tony would do some grand romantic gesture, which was sweet but usually ended up with them half naked on the couch eating leftover takeaway anyway. So Darcy ended up living with a man and for once, like any other woman in love; she trusted that he was different, that he wouldn’t let her down.


End file.
